Do You Walk Over, Under, Around, or Through Your Fears?

I’ve already told you how I feel about procrastination:

“When you intentionally put off doing something, that doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you; it means there’s something wrong with the situation!”

And I truly believe this to be true.

Which is why when I recently found myself struggling to pack for my upcoming 3-month adventure to South America, I knew something was up.

But what?

Everything’s been planned out. I have a safe place to stay when I arrive. I was in South America for 6 months last year, so I have a pretty good handle on what to expect when I arrive.

But something’s been off. And after sitting on my yoga mat for 2 hours this morning, I was finally able to label the emotion I’ve been feeling for several weeks now:


After more contemplation, I realized that this fear is mostly surrounding the question of whether or not I’ve made the right decision to head to South America at this time in my life.

As you may already know, my life has been in transition for quite some time now.

Is 3 more months in a temporary location really what I need right now?


I acknowledge that this is a valid question to be asking. However when I made the decision to take this trip, there was zero fear. So what happened?

Well, I’m sure you can relate to this: Over the last few weeks, the trust I have in my own decision making abilities has caused self-doubt.

As a result, I’ve put off packing. And for weeks, I’ve been procrastinating on tightening up the last minute details of my trip.

Well, it’s go time. My flight leaves in less than 48 hours.

As I sat on my mat this morning, the thought of canceling this whole trip seemed very tempting.

Oh how nice it would be to just continue on with my life and not make a change!

Sounds familiar, right? This can happen with decisions of any magnitude: The element of self-doubt can really make things scary!

A huge weight was lifted off my shoulders as I thought about how much easier it would be to just plug along and not follow through with my plans.

But this bliss didn’t last long.

I know better than to make decisions from a place of fear. It’s choosing temporary relief over long term happiness: NEVER a good choice.

So, in spite of the twisting fear brewing in my gut, I decided to spend the day packing. And I am proud to say that I am almost done.

Now THAT’S a relief! 

Recently, I came across this quote:

“There are four ways you can handle fear. You can go over it, under it, or around it. But if you are ever to put fear behind you, you must walk straight through it. Once you put fear behind you. Leave it there.” – Donna Favors

This week, I am choosing to walk straight through my fears. And I hope you will join me.

Tell me in the comments below how YOU will walk through fear this week!

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6 Responses to Do You Walk Over, Under, Around, or Through Your Fears?

  1. Janice says:

    Hi Victoria
    Thank you for this post and the quote – that is going straight into my diary!
    Last year I heard that Susan Jeffers (author of Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway) had sadly died, and I decided that my theme for 2013 would be exactly this. Only 2 weeks into the New Year and I have:-

    – been to 3 training sessions (intense circuit training). Doing box jumps, I was afraid of jumping onto the step – I’m little, it seemed quite high – but the 2nd time around I ‘walked straight through it’ and made the jump. Result!
    – made some new contacts for a ‘new start-up’ coaching group
    – drafted a flyer for an idea I’ve had – and have made myself accountable to someone for getting it done!
    – called the Samaritans to volunteer – and I’m off to an Open Evening next week
    – made recommendations for contacts on LinkedIn (something I was scared to do before)
    – joined an ‘adventure’ social group
    – started Burlesque!

    You are so right … self-doubt can creep up on you without realising … but noting down all my achievements – without judging/evaluating/comparing to others, is helping me to walk straight through the fear!


    P.S. I found your ‘7 tips to develop a daily practice’ very inspiring (from Tiny Buddha newsletter). I have printed it off and will keep it in my diary as a reminder.

    • Beautiful Janice! It sounds like you’ve really started to embrace life. All I can say is this: KEEP GOING!!!! I’m so glad you found the “7 Tips to Develop a Daily Practice” helpful! xoxo – Victoria

  2. amy says:

    hi victoria,
    i signed up for your 21 day program…but havnt heard back?

  3. Abel Tom says:

    Thanks for your article.You strike me with the simple and unassuming way of your writing.For me as akeen reader of personal development work,this is what sets apart genuine life coaches as opposed to complicated thoughts shared by others that leaves a reader bewildered and confused.I read somewhere that fear and self doubt are destructive twins,infact the greatest enemies of the human race.I love the simple direct approach you suggest on how to tacle fear.I would like to get in touch personally as i would like to ask some questions and get coaching.The challenge or is it the blessing is that i live and work in Kenya,Africa, where personal development and coaching is not appreciated as yet.Are you willing to advise?God bless you.

    • Abel, Thank you for your comment. I’m glad you find my writing style easy to digest. I try to be honest and open, and use my life experience and training to guide people on their own journeys. I like to help my clients develop a daily practice – their own space to explore. That way, once we’ve worked through their turmoil and our sessions are over, they still have their practice. As I mentioned in my email to you yesterday, I can’t speak for other coaches, but for me, my job is to help YOU develop the tools to help yourself. I’m glad you find this approach to tackling fear helpful. I know it’s helped me many times! – Victoria

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