Why Are You Stuck? 5 Questions to Ask Yourself


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Do any of the following statements resonate with you?

“I  hate my job, but I don’t feel motivated to look for a new one.”

“I’m unhappy in my relationship, but I continue to stay.”

“I’m physically uncomfortable, but I don’t take steps to get healthy.”

“I hate where I live, but I won’t even consider moving.”

If you said “Yes” to any of the above statements, then chances are: You’re stuck. And you know it.

You say you want to change. You say you want to feel “unstuck” and “happy,” but every day you make a choice to remain exactly where you are, doing exactly the same thing that’s making you feel stuck and unhappy.

So what’s REALLY going on here?

Here are 5 questions to ask yourself that will help you uncover why you continue to remain stuck in your life:

1.  “What am I afraid of?”

Fear is the number one reason we don’t make changes in our life, and is therefore the number one reason we feel stuck.

Fear of failure. Fear of making a mistake. Fear of not being good enough.

But there are also more practical fears: Fear of not having enough money. Fear of not having medical insurance. Fear of being alone.

And even the fear of being healthy.

What are you afraid of? Because all of those fears I just mentioned above can be overcome and worked around.

All of them.

So tell me what you fear and I’ll tell you how to jump over it.

2. “Do I know what I want?”

This is actually a huge issue for most people. They know they hate their job. They know their miserable in their relationship. They know they hate where they live.

They are very clear about what they don’t want.

But when I ask them to tell me what they do want, they usually have no clue:

“I just don’t want this.”

Well that’s great, but that’s not going to help you move forward any time soon.

Rather than focusing on all the reasons you feel stuck, start spending time figuring out exactly what you want.

Manifesting what you want in your life is actually the easy part, so don’t worry about that: Get clear first.

3. “Am I giving my power away?”

Do you ask people permission to “unstick” yourself? If you know you want a new job; if you know you want to move to another state; if you know you want to end your relationship; then why are you asking for other people’s advice?

Just stop.

If you want to do something, do it. Stop giving your power away. Everybody is going to have an opinion about what you should and shouldn’t do with your life, but at the end of the day, it’s YOUR life.

So if you are incapable of taking their advice at face value, stop asking for it. Trust yourself to make the right decision for YOU, and go for it.

4. “Where is my energy going?”

Making changes takes time and energy, and if our energy is low, it can be very difficult to feel motivated to change.

So stop what you’re doing right now and check in with yourself: How is your current energy level? Do you feel excited and vibrant? Or do you feel lethargic and bored?

Now consider this: What do you spend most of your time thinking about? Are you thinking about exciting new ways to move forward and make changes in your life? Are you enjoying the present moment?

Or are you spending most of your time worrying about something or someone?

If all your energy resources are being sucked dry by your current circumstances, it can be next to impossible to muster up the fuel to ignite change in your life.

Eliminate as many energy sucks as possible. Stop burning the candle at both ends.

5. “What do I need to make a change?”

Is it money? Is it time? Is it a website? Is it emotional support?

What do you need? Or rather, what do you THINK you need? Because I can tell you one thing with 100% certainty:

You have everything you need, right here, right now, to start moving forward in your life.

The only thing you really need in this moment is to stop making excuses.

Have a little confidence! You’ve got this.

So tell me in the comments below: Why do you feel stuck in your life?

{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

Jinean May 28, 2013 at 9:39 pm

Creative Souls are freedom seekers who also seek recognition in the smallest of places. Those places are in their personal lives, their personal relationships and the interactivity that happens within those close relationships. If there is upset in those relationships – anyone’s life whether creative or not, will be upset – conversely, if things are smooth, life is comforting to all as well. All people seek to be acknowledged as the person they are. If anyone is in a relationship to change that person, it is not a good place to be. It is the person who desires change that can make change and create opportunity – but only when they can, not because someone else wants it, meaning change. All people in some form get locked up – and most of the time it is because there are so many opportunities presenting themselves that it is hard to choose which direction to go and it appears that it is taking longer when in fact it is about taking the time for that person to walk the path with their own character. Brendon Burchard writes in his book, “The Charge”, that, “…all the energy and influence we ever want in life is controlled by one thing: whether or not we are purposefully acting as our highest selves. From that place of character flows grace and love, and in that place we find happiness and meaning…”. The beauty is the journey to watch someone fly because they chose to fly, not make them fly when walking was a better choice for them.


Victoria Gigante May 29, 2013 at 12:57 pm

Jinean: Thank you for sharing. I love what you’ve written here, “The beauty is the journey to watch someone fly because they chose to fly, not make them fly when walking was a better choice for them.” Very well stated, and definitely true! -Victoria


Ian July 24, 2013 at 1:07 pm

So tell me in the comments below: Why do you feel stuck in your life?

Fear that I am past the time of opportunities in my life. Fear that I am unable to break the patterns I have established, unable to overcome the inertia of a long period of lack of direction and motivation.


Victoria Gigante July 24, 2013 at 9:15 pm

Thank you for sharing, Ian. Fear is HUGE and a very common reason many people feel stuck in their life. The best way to overcome fear is through ACTION. What can you do today to walk INTO the fear, as opposed to running away from it and judging it? Can you detach from labeling “fear” as “bad” and simply acknowledge that it just is? In fact, it’s a sign that you’re doing exactly what you need to do! Embrace the fear! It means you’re going in the right direction. Perhaps once you reframe what your fear is trying to tell you, you’ll feel more motivated to move forward. Also, try to limit your expectations about where you’re supposed to be in your life and how things are supposed to look. That’s just fuel for your limiting beliefs! -Victoria


Maurice Moore October 10, 2013 at 8:04 am

Great blog!


nuwairah hafiz December 25, 2014 at 12:19 am

Great blog!!!


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